Tuesday, August 4, 2009

My Translation Of Thoughts

I’m missing my other half. Due to work we had to be parted for 4 days. It has never occurred to me that my mind would go blank without his presence. I had absolutely no idea what to blog and during the days what to do!!! I am basically lost!!! And it has never hit me before because back then I don’t blog but given the situation now, I was clueless as to what caused my mind and half of my body to partially shut down.
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I had a long moment looking at my laptop screen and thinking to myself what is it that made me slacking this few days. When suddenly I notice..it’s his presence that I miss so much. Sometimes we could just be together in total silence..no word uttered but still it’s a moment by itself. Yes that’s the reason as to why there is no jovial entry or something totally awesome or inspiring. I derived my inspiration from him!!!
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I for once feel suffocated for not being able to portray myself independently. What has become to the women I was 10 years back?? I was a free spirited girl back then doing almost everything out of the book and a major headache to my parents. I wouldn’t want to caused more harm to my love ones but I used to be so self reliant.

Now I expected everything to be done by him including banking my monthly ‘duit kutu’ !!!. and during his absence..i go numb!! It is by far a trait I would like to inhabit and perhaps a little change of direction wont hurt anybody. It’s time I grow up again and take charge of something. The problem is..i have become complacent in my situation. A kick on the bu*t will do me wonders!!! Hahaha.



6 comments:

adriana az said...

hahahaha...baru sedar ke queen of leisure?u wanna me kick yr b**t?it wud be my pleasure...yup,you're a different person..you're right about not being independant,sthing tht i miss about you.we had tht in common until you got married..hehehe..yup,dont change too much ya..i'm afraid we wont be able to see things eye to eye anymore :(

Amelia Khalik said...

hehehe...yeah too much leisure n lazyness goin on..still d same me but with a bigger n heavier bu*t..hehehe

kaezrin said...

sama lah kita..sometime bila depan mata tak pernah realise but bila hubby takde aghhh i get stress up easily...i think he spoilt me so much and makes his absence grew my heart to the max kan...

Abrahyn said...

i dah rasa....last 2 weeks, Jon away from me for 1 week taw! ngggeeeee...

Amelia Khalik said...

Elin..i agree they spoilt us too much!!! hahaha..yeah blame it on others yea dak..pas tuh bila org tuh takde mulalah menglabah!! kekeke

Amelia Khalik said...

Abrahyn...oohhh u too!!..kesian kan kita nie..hehehe