Friday, July 23, 2010

In Memory Of Maksu...

I dont know how to start this entry, i've been staring at my lappie screen and wondering the right way to say it. We lay her to rest this morning at 10 am. Finally she left us to meet her creator, the almighty Allah swt. My tears are cheap..they drop at every second and every thought of her.

I was at mom's place when we received the call from my uncle yesterday (22/7) at 3.30 pm. My heart cringe looking at mom sobbing. She has lost her only sister. She said she felt so alone, all i could do was nod and pretend to hear her words. I felt pain in my chest and suffocated, perhaps because i was crying so hard. I have never felt this kind of sadness i dont even know how to describe.

After almost 2 years of battling cancer, she passed away peacefully at the age of 47. For the past 2 months i've been her constant visitors. I listen to her cries of pain, to her rambling and her hope for tomorrow. Every now and then i utter words of courage, or perhaps lie. Told her she'll be able to walk outside the house soon, that she'll get better so that she can perform her 'umrah' again. So many dreams...

She's in good place now..i know she'll be among his many angels, my beautiful aunt is a good wife, mother and friend. Letting go is the hardest thing to do. Despite being reminded that she no longer suffer in this painful world..i am still selfish to want her to be with us. I pray to be forgiven for my sin. Rest in peace dear maksu..i miss u so much!!! Al Fatihah....
:
Datin Hajjah Asmah Bt Hashim
1963-2010

10 comments:

Blossom inch said...

my deepest condolences to the whole family. Hugs

teacher jessy said...

My condolences to you & your family. Sorry to hear bout ur auntie & I know how it feels to let someone dear to go. Your aunt is such a beautiful woman. Be strong & do take care dear :)

Sarah A said...

Inna Lillaahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Raaji'oon.

May Allah Subhana wa'tala grant you and your family sabr at this difficult time. May your Aunt be granted Jannah al Firdous. Ameen.

InshaAllah you will all be in my du'as.

Your sister in Islam, Sarah

Lynnda Hosni said...

Inna Lillaahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Raaji'oon...

Al-Fatiha....

My heart and du'a is with you...
InshaAllah you're a strong woman...xoxo...

mJ said...

takziah...my condolence to you n your family...al fatihah for arwah

Amelia Khalik said...

Dear All, thank u so much for the 'doa' n wishes. I know she's in better place but i'm bad with goodbyes..i guess it will take sometimes to feel okay again..

Craftylicious said...

Dear Ame, My Hearfelt condolences to you & your family..May God give you'll the strength to pull through this difficult time..Take care & hugs

The Nostalgic Scrapper said...

Salam... i understand your lost...be strong... i lost my own father to cancer... it must have been a struggle for your mother... but rmb sufferings are a way of cleansing one's self frm sins...truly Allah is all loving.

Take care.

Amelia Khalik said...

Sharm, thanks a lot. I believe only time will heal the pain.

TNS, arwah was my aunty not my mom. But she's someone close to me. I shared my chilhood with her cos she was staying with us until her day of 'akad'. The pain itself is like losing a sister! but insyAllah time will heal all pain..

Wati Basri said...

babe..my deepest condolences..its not easy losing someone as precious, but she is a better place now!remember her always..hugs!